Friendship, Lesson 1

My sweet babes, over the next 20 years you will be bullied. You will get hurt. Your hearts will be broken. You'll cry at the dance. A friend will turn on you. A clique of kids will reject you.

And through it all, we will remind you how amazing you are and how much we love you, but none of our words will matter to your sweet teenage soul.

What will matter, however, is the collection of people you choose to become your lifelong friends. These are people that know you through life phases and changes, celebrations and failures, heartbreaks and first jobs. And second jobs. And marriages. Divorces. Babies. Whatever. They risk your friendship to confront you about what's right for you. They're the ones who tell you about the food in your teeth and listen to your shamelessly dramatic rants about whatever was important to you that day. And they love you anyway.

I met some of those friends at Miami, and over 15 years later we are still gathering for reunions. This one was perfect - no husbands or kids, and only scattered talk of them. Maybe we're all at the age and phase of life now where the transitions are over and it's about us again. It's more likely that we have all been driven insane by them, and being in Oxford meant getting back to who we were before we started taking care of everyone else.

It was the perfect girls weekend - honest, easy and natural. That's the essence of friendships that stand the test of distance and time. If you ever need to present yourself as something you're not, keep searching.

My babies, prom dates will come and go, but hold on tight to your family and your lifelong friends. They are your history, and in some way they shaped you—they are a part of you. And you are brilliant. Choose well!